I know this hurts, but just hear me out.

Hey there! How are ya! The other night at karaoke was pretty fun, wasn't it. Man, we were both pretty drunk and I think we need to sit down and chat.

Listen, the other night. Yeah, I think we took our relationship too far and we need to take a step back. Remember when we met when I first got here six years ago and the cool thing for me to do as a new guy was to impress the co-workers with a Japanese song? We had a good time just jabbing each other in the shoulder as good friends. I know the language barrier was a bit of a big deal and it was tough to communicate. Maybe that's why we got along at first; I never really knew if you were laughing with me or at me. Truth be told? I didn't really care. I just enjoyed your company.

And then as time went on, you started dating some of my friends on and off as we became more able and more confident with our Japanese ability. Again, we had some good times at karaoke together, and sometimes in little standing bars, or sometimes, on TV when we were just curious.

But this last weekend, I think we both know, we took things a bit too far. We need to not see each other for awhile and see how things pan out.

Oh, come on now! Please don't be like that! Remember all the good times we had? Remember ringing ridiculous little bells with Kimura Kaela? Hell, we even went to the movies and watched Kill Bill just so I could learn some of your history! Turns out Kaji Meiko is not only pretty good BUT ONE OF THE MOST UNDERRATED JAPANESE SINGERS OF ALL TIME! But hey, I'm just saying! We even went to a couple of Ga Ga Ga Special concerts together and, as you know, they rocked!

I was just really hoping that we could get through this all civilly, and one day be able to just hang out in a bar with our friends English Punk Rock, Heavy Metal, and Ska. Yeah, I know that little whore American Pop shows up every now and then and ruins the night, but we can always go somewhere else. We normally run into our old buddies 80's and sometimes Grunge! Never a bad thing!

So is that cool? Can we just be friends for a bit until it's not awkward anymore?

WELL FUCK YOU THEN!! I never liked you anyway! You have done nothing but annoy me for the full six years that I have lived here and not onc...NOT ONCE!!!...have you ever done anything for me!! I have tried SOOOOOOO hard to understand you!! But do you care!? NO!! You keep putting forth the same goddamn cookie cutter effort that you have since the mid-90's! You haven't been able to keep a steady audience past high school kids, but hey! At least they like the same old crap!!!

Oh, and the whole time, I was cheating on you with Enka!!!

Now get the hell out of my way! I'm off to have a couple beers with the boys in Tokyo Ska Paradise Orchestra and Ska Flames! Yeah. Ska. It kicks ass and has far more originality than you!